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How to Flirt With a Man and Get Attention |
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If you're finding yourself
almost desperately trying to get the attention of
a man you're already deep into a relationship
with, or a new man who you just KNOW likes you,
you may be - instinctively - doing all the WRONG
things. And it's not your fault. We women have been taught to treasure men so much, to consider them to be such prizes, that no matter what we do, or how "cool" we try to be, our emotions get caught up when we're around a man we like. Have you ever found yourself racking your brain trying to figure out how to get a man's attention? Either the man you've noticed, the man you've been flirting with, or the man you've been with for years seems to have so much going on in his life - it's like you're like an afterthought to him? He seems to really like you when he's with you, but when he's not, he forgets all about you? It's incredibly frustrating. It's hard not to believe he's into you when he's all over you, but then he doesn't call for a week and you go nuts. I was the queen of that kind of thing. Looking back, I'm not even sure they were into me when they were with me. I'm not sure I wasn't making it up because I wanted them to be into me. I'm pretty sure I never really believed ANY man could be REALLY into me. I thought they were with me because of sex, or because I was so undemanding, understanding and working so hard to keep them there. One night I found myself in a booth in a coffee shop sitting next to the man I was crazy about for the whole year I'd been with him. In the booth with us, sitting opposite him, was a woman we both worked with in a theater group. She wasn't prettier, smarter, funnier, sexier, thinner or anything else than me - just different. I remember sitting there watching - I really did actually just sit there and watch them flirt with each other until I got so sick to my stomach I had to leave. Until I actually got up and went back into the theater where I was rehearsing (just to get out of the coffee shop), I remember curling up to him in that booth with the red plastic seats, and touching him. I remember the choice I made to completely not even notice them flirting, until I couldn't avoid it. I remember how absolutely brazen the whole thing was. And me just sitting there. It took me a while in my life, but I was never again such a doormat. Have you ever found yourself in a similar situation? Maybe not as in-your-face as this one was for me (I hope you've never had to go through that), but something sort of underground? A feeling you had? Just sort of not feeling right? Or good about yourself? After that awful night, and the breakup conversation we had over the phone later, after midnight, I remember that I didn't even cry. I felt humiliated, but at the same time I was relieved. It was though it was finally over, and I was glad. I'd somehow put myself through a year of pretending I was in a relationship, when, now it all seemed so clear, I really wasn't. And I looked back to our very first date, and saw clear as a bell all the Red Flags that were right in my face. Red Flags I never wanted to see. He was still hung up on his ex-wife. She was actually still in his life. He was always doing things for her. He was there for her. He talked about her. What was I thinking? I even remember him actually SAYING to me that we weren't going anywhere as a couple. That we were friends. Or whatever he might've said. I even remember other things that I'm almost too embarrassed to tell you about other women in the picture. It's really easy for me - even now! - to get mad at myself for everything I did that wasn't good for me way back then. But I know - with my whole being - that running myself down for what I did in the past (even just yesterday or 5 minutes ago) ISN'T GOOD FOR ME NOW! And so, every moment of my life, I focus on MAKING MYSELF HAPPY. And the amazing thing about this is, as soon as I stopped running myself down and started making myself happy - I attracted my husband. And my husband is a man who wanted - and still wants, every day - to MAKE ME HAPPY! And the difference between my husband and that man in the booth is night and day. The difference isn't even about THEM! I'd have to say that the man in the booth was more my fantasy movie-star vision with particular- looking grayish hair and a kind of coldness to him (though my husband is actually handsomer and more adorable). The man in the booth was always financially strapped and kind of boyish, where my husband took me to a nice restaurant and clever places for dates right off. But the real difference was all about ME. With the man in the booth, I was always on edge, on tenderhooks. I was always worried, wondering, and caught up somehow. With my husband, I was relaxed, leaning back, and happy. You'd think that would be simple, but it took me years and years to get there. It took me years and years to just give a man like my husband a chance. Because what the man in the booth wanted was for me to make HIM happy. And what my husband wanted was to make ME happy! And, all those years ago, I was so busy running myself down and trying to make men happy, I couldn't even ALLOW a man to make me happy. I'd pretty much turn any man who wanted to make me happy down flat. ***Self-esteem is the key to getting love from a man. If you don't feel good about yourself, you'll almost automatically be attracted to and attract a man who doesn't feel good about himself, either - and so he will be incapable of loving YOU. No matter how much you do or how sweet and sexy you are, and how many things you do and say the "right way" you will never change your relationship until you start to change the way you feel about yourself. And it's actually EASY! And FAST, too. My Heart Connection Toolkit is designed to help you do that - to raise your self-esteem and get you believing the truth - which is that you are FABULOUS, and you CAN have EVERYTHING you want. The Toolkit is all about raising your self-esteem - from the inside out, and from the outside in, too - by using words and body language with men that will HELP you raise your self-esteem instead of beating it up. |
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What You’ll Learn From Rori Raye
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