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Are You Ready To Get
The Full-Out,
The moment my boyfriend told me “he wasn’t ready” for marriage, I thought my life was over. Time after time I’d met and dated great men, and at that crucial period when we were about to move forward to a true commitment, things would fall apart. Sometimes it would be on date 3 – he’d just stop calling. Sometimes we’d be together for a year and things would collapse. But with this boyfriend, I thought things would be different. He’d pursued me so intently. We’d moved in together. He’d promised marriage and a family. But then he changed his tune, and I was devastated. What was going on? Was it something I did wrong? Or was it something going on inside him? I started to think that men just won’t commit. That it was impossible. That there was something fundamentally wrong with men - that they just didn’t have the commitment gene. I knew I was ready. I knew I was a good catch, with so much love and companionship to give. So why didn’t the men in my life see that? I felt as though relationships were the most challenging things in the universe, and men were just not up to the task. At least… I felt that way until I figured out something incredible. I realized that I could absolutely inspire that “forever feeling” in a man. That I could be the person in the relationship deciding whether or not I was satisfied, rather than waiting for him to “come around.” And I learned that I could simply …. BE in a great relationship, without having to DO any work at all to keep it together or keep it moving forward. That I could feel loved and secure ALL the time, and never have to walk on eggshells or worry what was going to happen next. That I could feel REAL love grow inside me for a man because I felt so safe and happy and REALLY LOVED by him, on a deep emotional level, instead of being stuck in the superficial “infatuation” kind of feeling I’d always experienced, and mistaken for the “real thing.” That I could KNOW, by experiencing it, what the “Real Thing” was – how it came with commitment and security, instead of with those off-balance, “pining” emotions I used to have. That men really DO want to commit, and that my man really DID want to commit – and how to inspire HIM to make that happen instead of trying to make it happen myself. How a lifetime of love isn’t just a dream – it can be REALITY. And that it can happen FAST, if you know how. (I remember how everyone always told me love took “time.” And now I know that, yes, love GROWS over time …deeper and deeper and more and more amazing…but it can – and should! – BEGIN by feeling wonderful and just get better and better.) That’s why I’m here. Because I’ve learned the hard way, and I don’t want you to have to go through the pain and despair that I went through. 12 years ago, I started thinking about the secret I stumbled upon through my trial-and-error, and since then I’ve spent several years studying about men and what brings couples to loving, committed relationships. In the last 4 years I’ve been able to help women all over the world get the kind of relationship they want through my personal coaching and through my eBook and newsletters. And now I’ve come up with a simple plan you can follow that will make it easy to have the relationship you deserve. To take the man you’re seeing and inspire him to commit to you now and forever. To get you to your Happy Ever After. But before you can get to Happy Ever After, you need to understand a few things. We need to talk about what’s going on, and why he’s not feeling “the call” of commitment with you in the first place. Warning Signs That He
Doesn’t If you’re starting to feel nervous about where your relationship is going, you probably have a good reason to feel that way. As women, we have an intuitive ability to notice if something doesn’t “feel right” with our man. And the reality is… men won’t come out and say to you “You know honey, I don’t really see myself making a commitment to you… and here’s why.” If only it could be that simple! Instead, he ends up acting out his feelings through INDIRECT SIGNALS. He does things like not call as frequently (or maybe not even call at all!) Or he spends more time at work and with the “guys.” It might look like the relationship is moving forward, because you’ve been on so many dates together and maybe even met his friends and family, and you spend a lot of time together, but somewhere, inside yourself, you just KNOW it’s NOT moving forward. It’s as if he’s just in some kind of “casual” dating routine with you. And slowly, slowly – you see various warning signs that things are moving backwards, or they are stuck, between you. The fact is, if you are noticing several of the following actions, words or feelings, then you are right to be worried:
Sound familiar? Don’t worry. As hopeless and frustrated as you feel, there is a real and easy solution that can prevent the collapse of your relationship, and create a “forever feeling” in him that will make him suddenly WANT lifelong romance and happiness with you…more than anything else in his life.. But you have to be careful. If you handle this situation incorrectly, there is no way you will ever feel secure and satisfied in your relationship… even if he doesn’t officially break it off. He’ll never be committed in his heart – in the deep emotional place that determines how he acts and will treat you for the rest of your life. I should know. I almost ruined everything. The Big Mistakes I Made That Almost Ruined My Chances At Marriage And Commitment I’ll tell you something funny… When I first met my husband, I didn’t even like him. In fact, I wanted nothing to do with him. It’s only because he pursued me, tracked me down, pampered me and treated me like a queen that I gave him the time of day. His persistence eventually won me over, and as I started to realize how safe and loved I felt, I developed powerful feelings for him. The whole time, I’d been comfortable, felt secure, never worried, was so happy, and truly enjoyed the fact that he was in love with me – maybe even more in love with me than I was with him. And that’s why, when my roommate moved out and he suggested that he move in, I said yes. I told him from the very beginning that I wasn’t looking for just a boyfriend. That I wanted to get married and have children. He assured me that he had the same intention, and that he’d move in and we’d be engaged by the New Year. Because he’d been so devoted… so attentive… and so “in love” with me, I believed him. So he moved in. We got along, had fun, and I started thinking about weddings, and when and how he’d propose to me. Only he didn’t. New Year’s Eve came, I got dressed up, and instead of ending up with a proposal when the silver ball dropped in Times Square, I got the “speech” about how he “wasn’t ready.” That he needed more time, and if I really cared about him I’d give him some space. I was stunned. It felt like the floor had dropped out from below me and I entered an intense state of panic and desperation. I’d gotten myself into not just an EMOTIONAL bind, but a PHYSICAL one. If we broke up, my whole life would have to change! He was not only my boyfriend – but also my roommate – and I couldn’t afford to stay in my apartment without him. I remember feeling almost violently angry, but then feeling terrified of ruining everything. “What if all he needs is a bit more time?” I asked myself – “do I want to ruin it by getting upset?” He’d worked SO HARD to get me – I was STUNNED. I couldn’t throw him out… I couldn’t afford the rent by myself I felt totally, completely, utterly TRAPPED. And I didn’t have a clue how to get myself out of this mess and into the married life I was desperate for. I remember peeling off my dress and sexy lingerie I’d purchased especially for this occasion of the proposal I’d expected, and realizing I’d be climbing into bed with this man who’d just devastated me. My anxiety level went through the roof, I couldn’t sleep, and I was such a combination of anger and fear I just kept stuffing my feelings down and making all the worst mistakes you could possibly make. I could barely get in touch with WHAT I was feeling, much less figure out a way to communicate it to him. I didn’t know if I wanted to send him away and start over somehow, or if I wanted to “make nice” so that he’d want to stay and commit. I couldn’t decide whether to be “loving” and let him have all the time he needed, or be “firm” about my needs and tell him to move out until he could make up his mind. It was so uncomfortable that first week, while I was trying to figure out what to do. There was so much tension between us – I just knew I was driving him away, even though I wasn’t bringing up the subject of “commitment.” And every time it DID get brought up, I remember being very reasonable and trying to “convince” him that marrying me was the “smartest” move he could make by showing off all the qualities he loved about me – my sense of humor, my enjoyment of sex, my brains and talents. And nothing helped, and, truly – nothing mattered. I felt absolutely powerless. And that’s when I realized… I’d been making some serious mistakes. Mistakes most women made, and I needed to do something about it. Fast. If You Make ANY Of The Following Mistakes You Will Break Up, Or Be Miserable In Your Relationship, For The Rest Of Your Life Here I was, in a desperate emotional, physical and financial situation. But it’s one that I am now grateful for having experienced. Because by going through it, I realized firsthand the big mistakes I (and most women) was making. And before we talk about how I CORRECTED my mistakes to create a lifelong commitment in my husband (yes, he did propose!) first I needed to understand what I was doing to push him away… Mistake #1: Focusing On Events, Not Feelings Have you ever felt amazing, relaxed and secure because he took you somewhere very special? Or introduced you to his guy friends and maybe even his mother? Or has just the fact that you’re almost to a whole year of being together? Or moved in with you? We women are taught to believe that time “put in” and events MEAN SOMETHING to a man – that it means as much to him as it does to us. If he’s introduced us to his children, or to his friends at work, we’re on cloud nine. We think the engagement ring and the wedding dress has to be coming soon. That these things are “milestones” in our relationship, moving us closer and closer to commitment and marriage. And we couldn’t be more wrong. Men just don’t see and experience things the way we do. Time means NOTHING to a man. Sometimes, being in a nice, comfortable HOLDING PATTERN with us while he focuses on OTHER THINGS is EXACTLY what he has in mind! And that’s how we fall into the Trap of “Just Friends” and become “stepping stones” for our men. They spend time with us, but then they go and commit to someone else. And it’s as though we missed the signals that would have warned us, because we were focused on the EVENTS. Events are only moments to hang EXPERIENCES on – and unless we can get into our man’s heart, and let him into ours so that a deep emotional bond gets created in every moment – even moments that may not feel so fun and happy to us, but still have a HUGE effect on our man because of how we RELATE to him in that moment – to his heart and body and NOT just his mind, - unless we can ENGAGE his heart, we DOOM ourselves to a superficial level that will never get us to where we want to go – total lifelong commitment. To get your man to move forward emotionally with you – to actually LEAD you forward – you have to learn HOW to engage his heart. Mistake #2: Thinking Exclusive Means Committed How many of you have been comfortable in a relationship, only to have the man you are seeing tell you he’s “met someone else,” or “found someone who really gets me.” Or worse- have the man you recently broke up with be married to SOMEONE ELSE within months of the end of your relationship. How does that happen? How can it be that a man can be exclusive with you, and then “fall for” someone else so easily? It’s because he’s not committed to you. Exclusivity means “I won’t see anyone else while I am with you.” It does not mean “I’ll never see anyone else ever again. Someday, we will be married and have a family and lots and lots of babies.” So when a man “meets someone else” and tells you, he is honoring his word by ending his exclusivity with you. Oftentimes, women focus on getting a man to be exclusive with them – but this is only a temporary state. Instead, you need to focus on getting him committed to you. When that happens, he’ll be exclusive AND won’t “fall for” another woman ever again! Mistake #3: Talking About Your Relationship, Not Creating It When you noticed your man growing distant, how many of you decided to talk to him about it? Did you ask him how he was feeling? Why he was acting the way he was? Did you try to talk about “where your relationship was going” and your “future together”? I bet most of you have! That’s because we woman like to talk about our feelings and get them in the open. We like to know what’s coming down the road and prepare ourselves physically and emotionally. Men are the complete opposite. When you talk to a man about your relationship, you have the absolute OPPOSITE effect on him than you intended. Men are often thinking about things when we’re feeling emotional, and then at other times, they’re completely in their feelings, enjoying the present moment, when we’re up in our heads thinking. Men think of other men as fellow thinkers. And though we often hear men say how much they hate how “emotional” we women are – it’s that EMOTIONAL part of us they CRAVE. They are so stuck in their brains, so much of the time, that if we’re stuck in ours, they can’t connect to us. So when we talk to them about the relationship, it just seems like a bunch of dry facts. It feels like we want them to make some kind of mental decision about something THEY NEED to feel strongly about in their GUTS. Instead of INSPIRING a man to want to be with us, every time we talk about the relationship it feels to him like a laundry list of TO DO items. Like we want to create a future “plan” for how the relationship should go, or how he should behave – before HE does. Like we want what a relationship LOOKS LIKE before we create it from the inside out – WITH him – moment by moment. Mistake #4: You Panic… He Leaves Because you KNOW that “Lifelong-Commitment” is a frightening thing to a man, you’re afraid to say or do ANYTHING that might scare him even more and make him “run.” And those fears and anxieties make it impossible for you to be comfortable around him. What if you say or do the wrong thing? What if he thinks you’re pushing too hard? Or, worse, you think - what if he doesn’t KNOW how much you care? You go back and forth between worrying whether you’re too EASY to get or not available and loving ENOUGH. It’s so easy to get completely paralyzed by your fear and anger, and then guilt comes out of nowhere, keeps hitting you over the head as if YOU’RE to BLAME for everything that’s either happening or NOT happening in your relationship. All of this turns into a kind of “circle of misery” where the worse you feel, the worse he acts, and then the worse you feel… and on and on it goes as your relationship heads downward. All this worry we do trying to figure out what to do or say because of how it will affect HIM and our relationship leads to a horrible thing that most of us are all-too familiar with – that feeling of being completely UNNATURAL. It’s as though we just stop being ourselves. Actually, it’s as though we completely FORGOT HOW to be ourselves. We watch everything we say or do, and we’re so on edge that we become even MORE sensitive to everything HE says or does. And after awhile of feeling like that, not comfortable with ourselves, it gets harder and harder to break out of that. And the worst part is the effect all this has on him. Instead of making him want us more, because we’re relaxed and fun and making him happy and making ourselves happy, too – he can’t get a bead on who we REALLY ARE. He’s actually PUT OFF by the sense that we’re pretending with him. And then he gets more and more distant, calls less and less, and we get further and further AWAY from the commitment we want. There IS A
Surprisingly Simple Way Instead of panicking… Or talking about your relationship… Or mistaking events and exclusivity for commitment… There is a BETTER WAY to ignite his desire to commit to you, now and forever. And it begins with making sure that his desire to HAVE YOU is GREATER than his fear of commitment. And his desire will continue if you can create an ongoing experience for him that makes him FEEL that committing to you is worth trading in his “freedom.” Once I realized that, instead of “firing him up” about committing to me, I had actually taken away my now-husband’s desire by making all those mistakes over and over, day in and day out, I focused on getting my sense of POWER back, instead of trying to get HIM. I remembered everything I did and didn’t do in the very beginning of our relationship, when he couldn’t get enough of me and was totally chasing me. I remembered what that felt like, and how it felt for me to be pursued, and to not even care very much whether he was in my life at all. Instead of working so hard at the relationship, I worked hard on myself and on the rest of my life, and I focused on talking to him and acting around him the way I had at the beginning. The only problem was – I really “got” that it didn’t work if I just “pretended” I didn’t really care. He could see straight through that, and I just looked even NEEDIER than I had before. So I had to figure out a way to TRULY NOT CARE what happened to our relationship – and not because I didn’t care about and for him, and not because I didn’t care about being married to him, but because I knew I’d be all right no matter what, and that if I stuck to my own plan, I’d have the relationship I wanted, even if it wasn’t with him. And that’s when things REALLY started to MOVE. The “energy” between us changed completely. In my own mind I became a prize he needed to pursue in order to “win,” rather than something he was already guaranteed to have for the rest of his life. And almost instantly – he started FEELING that same thing again – that I was the prize he WANTED. I stopped even THINKING about the relationship, about our future, and what HE was feeling and thinking. Instead, I started figuring out what I should be doing in case this didn’t work out. I focused on making myself happy instead of trying to make HIM happy, or trying to GET HIM to make ME happy. I spoke to him like he was a ROOMATE I was sleeping with, instead of like a potential husband. Instead of worrying about frightening him off, I treated him as a “friend” who was ABOUT TO BE BOOTED OUT OF MY APARTMENT. I started to figure out what I should do for MYSELF. And then, even though I’d stopped trying to make anything happen in the relationship, even though I’d actually stopped CARING whether or not something WOULD happen, everything changed. Fast. I’d somehow hit on something that worked, and I didn’t even know what that was! Here I was, more attractive to him TIRED and UNCARING than I ever was trying to make him happy. Less than two weeks later, on my birthday, he proposed to me. It was very official – he’d brought a calendar to the restaurant so we could plan a date for the wedding! I’d somehow cracked a code and figured out how to trigger his DESIRE to wrap me up into a Life-Long Commitment. It was like a blueprint I’d never understood, but now I had a sense of what I was doing that was working, and I was able to keep the excitement AND peacefulness going – WITHOUT working at it at all. I didn’t have to do all the “work” and worrying, just to try to keep my “less-than” relationship afloat. I could finally relax and enjoy the freedom and comfort that only came once I knew my relationship was truly secure and lasting. The Secret To Getting Your Man Wild With Desire for Lifelong Commitment I’m about to share a huge secret with you. And to help you really get it, let’s review for a brief second… You already know now that a man is NOT going to commit to you just because “it’s time”, or because you’ve been going through the motions that would seem to lead to a more serious commitment. Commitment isn’t about “time” for a man, or about how many certain events and situations you’ve gone through together. Part of the secret about how and why your man will want to commit to you, is that commitment for a man is about him choosing to share more of the FEELINGS you already share together in the future. Commitment is an EMOTIONAL process. And the good news is that it’s a process you can easily trigger if you understand the different steps a man takes in order to feel “ready” and fully engage in lifelong commitment with you. And what’s even better…. I’ve broken down that process into 7 easy steps to help you move from uncertain and uncommitted to committed, secure and completely SATISFIED by your relationship. It’s all in my newest program, Communication Blueprint: The 7 Steps To Trigger His Lifelong Commitment. In this program, I’ll show you the different emotional processes that men and women go through to reach commitment, and how to align your processes so you can both be happy and move forward TOGETHER. You’ll find specific NEW TOOLS that include things to say and do that will connect you to your man on such a powerful emotional level that you’ll never have to question where your relationship is going. You’ll be so comfortable in your relationship, and be moving forward in such a natural way, that you’ll never feel overwhelmed by uncertainty, confusion or frustration again. You’ll understand what he’s thinking and feeling every step of the way, so you don’t have to sabotage your relationship by trying to “talk about it” or guess what to do to make him happy. You’ll know how he feels because I’ll share with you insight into his emotional journey, and how to interpret his behavior accurately without having to ask him. (This is what strangely bugs some men to no end.) You’ll know what to say and do because I’ll teach you. And I’ll introduce you to FIVE other experts on commitment to share their most powerful insights and tools to move you towards your “happily ever after.” What You’re About To Discover About Men and Lasting Commitment
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My I know how hard it is to find good advice about men and relationships. When I was struggling in my love life, the only women I had to talk to were struggling as much as I was... and even though we shared a lot, we couldn’t really find WHAT WORKED. My friends and family had lots of opinions, but nothing to say that actually helped. I hardly even knew anyone who had a romantic, sexy, fun, loving relationship. I wished they’d taught a class about “How To Do Relationships” back in high school, but they didn't… If you're at all like I was, you were expected to learn about love by “watching” and “doing,” and somehow know everything you needed to know “naturally.” The subtle assumption here was that you “get it” just because you were born a woman! So, as a grown woman, I felt “backward” because I couldn’t make everything work and hold my relationship together on my own. I felt almost stupid about men. But the truth was - my friends and I spent a lot of time complaining about men and our relationships because we were stuck doing the same things over and over again. We were just passing on to each other, over and over again, the same information that never worked. Now everything's changed. Since I turned my own nightmare relationship into the great, 20-year marriage I have now (and been able to see my clients experience relationship success so much faster and easier than they dreamed possible), and become a relationship “expert” myself, I've met and worked with so many other experts. Experts who could've helped me then, when I was struggling. And experts who can help you NOW. The fastest and easiest way I could think of to get their success stories and secrets to you was to bring them into a recording studio and interview them! My female friends were wonderful, as I know yours are. And I so wish I could have introduced all of us 20 years ago to these experts I now interview every month. Now I want to share all the amazing insights and tips I’m talking about with some of the world’s greatest experts with YOU. If you’re ready, I’d love to bring you into my “inner circle” and share these Interviews with you. In them you'll hear women (and men, too!) who have not only been through it themselves, and KNOW exactly what to do and not do in the same situations you're experiencing...but who've also spent years successfully teaching women how to have the kind of fulfillment in relationships we all want. Every month I do a live audio interview with someone whose extraordinary experience and insight will make you more successful with men, dating and relationships, and help you make a special man want to come closer to you instead of pull away, and want to commit to you MORE than he wants “freedom”. Here's How It Works... Just for TRYING out any one of my programs, I'll throw in a one-month FREE subscription to my “Interview Series” as a bonus.
And I know
you'll love your first FREE CD –
it’s with Christian Carter, an expert on
dating and relationships, who I got to open up
about what it's like to be a man, how men see
and feel about us women, the things that drive
men away, and the things that rope them in. Here’s What
You’re Going To
Get…
Because I want as many women as possible to benefit from this program, I've decided to price this program at only 5 easy payments of $49.97 for the CD version or… 5 easy payments of $59.97 for the DVD version… and I'm going to cover all the shipping costs myself if you live in the US (a small additional shipping and handling charge will apply to non-U.S. orders). And both versions come with my better-than-money-back “I’ll take all the risk” Guarantee…
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How To Tell If This
Program You won’t need this program if… Your man is wooing you and chasing you and offering engagement rings and a plan for the future – and you love him, too, and feel happy - you definitely don’t need to bother listening. But if you find yourself, like most women, wondering why he was so hot and moving so fast at the beginning and things have slowed now to a crawl, or how he could still be so “unsure” years into your relationship, then you’ll want to hear why and what you can do about it. If you're in a relationship right now , and your man is suddenly pulling away, or just seems to want to be “casual” with you, or has all kinds of “reasons” why he’s not “ready” to take the relationship all the way to a serious, lifelong commitment, or he’s stalling, and you feel totally stuck in a holding pattern, Commitment Blueprint will help you. If you're just starting to date again, perhaps after a break-up , and it’s all boring, challenging, and confusing - if you find yourself obsessing about each man you go out with that you liked, and feeling frightened and lonely after a date with someone you didn’t like, and all your old insecurities are showing up big time - this program will help you with that. If you're almost there - if your man is talking about the future but not DOING anything about it, if you’ve met his family and his friends and he’s calling you his “girlfriend,” but you’re not sure what he REALLY has in mind for you in his life, this program will help you compel HIM to move forward WITHOUT ultimatums, talking about the relationship, or playing games of any kind. Commitment Blueprint gives you a plan – a 7-Step plan to inspire your man to take the next step in your relationship: Lifelong Commitment. Why This Program Is Different From Anything Else Out There: You’ve probably read everything out there. If you’re like I was, you’ve read every book, consulted every person who says he or she KNOWS how to make a relationship work, and most of the time it’s terrific advice – but it’s usually general information, with no specific instructions, and it’s HARD TO DO. In Commitment Blueprint, you’ll hear the “Why” and “What” of all my powerful ideas, concepts and Tools so that you’ll UNDERSTAND what’s going on with you and your man, and why these Tools work. BUT, most important, you’ll SEE me, and other women actually go through the HOWS. You’ll be able to get RESULTS almost instantly, because you’ll GET bite-size Tools that work you up, baby-step by baby-step, to the bigger Tools, until, without any effort at all, you’re already accomplishing your goal! In other words, the self-esteem and emotional Tools are simple to do, and then, without trying – you FEEL BETTER and STRONGER. And the WORD Tools are laid out so simply that you can practice now, have fun with them, and see results with your man in less than an hour! And you can do them in a way that works with your unique personality and style and patterns so that you can express WHO YOU ARE so quickly that your stress will disappear and you’ll be amazed at how powerful you feel, and how much BETTER he TREATS you. You’ll learn specifically WHAT TO SAY to trigger HIS desire for commitment, instead of working so hard to create it yourself, and you’ll learn it because not only do I give you the exact words - the women who work with me one-on-one on the stage will DEMONSTRATE exactly how to do it. Dealing with an emotional situation like lifelong commitment can make ANY woman - even a supremely self-confident-in-so-many-other-areas-of-life woman - shaky. The advice about how to do this is usually so GENERAL that we’re AFRAID to try ANYTHING, in case it makes things worse. That’s why my techniques and Tools are so stress-free and simple. You use the Tools in non-scary ways with your man as practice and preparation, and by the time you’re ready to deliver power speeches and say things to your man that you might have been AFRAID to say before – you can do it EASILY. And the impact you’ll have on your man when you do it in this POWERFUL way, instead of the weak and non-working ways you’ve likely considered – ultimatums, emotional outbursts, talking it over reasonably – will thrill you. You’ll feel a sense of being comfortable in your own skin that you may NEVER have felt before – and a sense of MASTERY over some of the emotions that may have knocked you for a loop before – and HIS reaction will amaze you. He will react to even the SMALLEST Tool – which is why Commitment Blueprint is designed that way. To get you from wherever you are in your relationship to where you want to be – committed for life. I know you’ll have tremendous success with the “Blueprint” – you can DO this! You can take yourself into a man’s heart, you can melt his “fears” and make him believe that YOU are the only woman who can make him truly happy (you are!) – and that he has to act NOW to have you in his life forever. So, let me know how it works for you – I look forward to hearing your personal story. Love,
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